i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
