Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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