So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
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