Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize
