Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Randomize