we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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