a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I understand Curling. That high.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
