Swine flu. Run for my life!
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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