dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
