ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize
