Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
