Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize