We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
