the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
