I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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