he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize
