why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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