it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
