My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
