so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
