At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
