at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
