Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
