that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
