The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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