im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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