I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize