i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Randomize
