So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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