I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
