so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I wear drunk well.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
