So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
