Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
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