So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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