Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
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