I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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