Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Randomize
