I like to think it a success when the cops are called
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Randomize
