If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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