ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Randomize
