Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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