If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
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