My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Randomize
