Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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