What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
