I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Randomize
