Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
