it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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