Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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