I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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